So tonight After making zucchini fries with a friend (an almost succesful creation) http://www.theleangreenbean.com/crispy-parmesan-zucchini-fries/, I thought I would take a nice hot shower and unwind from the day. Little did I know what dangers were in store, lurking just around and underneath my adorable, brand spanking new, chevron, grey and cream shower curtain (side note. It took me almost 2 hours to decide which color shower curtain I wanted. I think I have a problem http://www.urbanoutfitters.com/urban/catalog/productdetail.jsp?id=23506892&parentid=A_FURN_BATH&color=004 ). I had just finished watching an episode of friends so of course was in a positive state of mind, almost jaunty. I was singing at the top of my lungs the newest single by Pink and that guy from FUN. I realize now that singing at the top of my lungs is most likely to the chagrin of my neighbors and I should maybe turn down the pipes. When I turned on the shower preparing myself for the warm, safe haven it provided, I looked inside only to find the beast.
Yes, the beast. It was probably 4 foot long with 100s of legs. Much to my horror I nearly stepped on a squirmy centipede.
This is the little guy. I guess I slightly exaggerated but he moved pretty quickly and was super just icky. No other word accurately describes him.
I quickly retracted my leg, freaked out, and thought for the third time today “why don’t I own a fly swatter or something to kill bugs”. As I assessed the situating, I quickly scanned the apartment for something to kill the monstrosity. My quick thinking skills (which really should be better developed if I decide I want to be an ER doctor) kicked in. I realized I should trap it in Tupperware, or beat the daylights out of it with a broom. I chose the more aggressive later of the options.
As I prepared for battle, I said a brief prayer that went something along the lines of “Please God don’t let this thing crawl on me.” I beat that thing with a broom until I was sure it was a goner and I the valiant victor. I searched frantically for something to pick it up with so I could send it to its watery grave. I found an envelope to scoop it up in and thought to myself how resourceful I am. Upon moving the centipede to the toilet, It must have had some sort of adrenaline release because it started moving again. At this point I wish I could say I was brave. I wish I could say I smashed it again with the broom like it was my job, however I cannot. I started screaming bloody murder. I am pretty sure I sounded like a girl on Criminal Minds, or Law and Order when a stranger in a clown suit enters her apartment. That is how frightened I was. I thought I killed that little creep and here he is, back to life, ready to crawl on me. NOT ON MY WATCH. I don’t want to get into the gory details, but let’s just say this time I am sure I won.
All I wanted was a nice soothing shower. Instead, what I got was a battle to the death with some little creep in my shower.
I am hoping I will be able to get some sleep and don’t have giant centipede dreams. I also hope centipedes do not travel in packs….